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Improve your mother-daughter relationship with these 3 tips

There are ways to improve your mother-daughter relationship, and it’s important to try to improve, because relationships between mothers and daughters can be fulfilling, rewarding, wonderful, loving; but they can be complicated. Daughters crave the love of their mothers, and vice-versa, but it can be difficult to move past the difficulties of the childhood and teenage years. At the same time, if you can achieve a healthy mother-daughter relationship, it’s good for you, good for your mom, as well as good for any kids you might have.

Forgive, even if you can’t forget

No one is perfect, and every parent, and every child, makes mistakes. As best as you can, try to forgive your mom for the things she did, and maybe still does, that frustrate you. If your mother is someone who tends to bring up the past, and all the things you did back then, you have two choices. You can either grin and bear it, or you can sincerely apologize for whatever happened, and then ask that the matter be closed so that you can move forward. Of course, that means you need to extend the same courtesy to your mother!

Do something together

Maybe you both love to sing, you can join a local church or woman’s choir. Maybe a weekly outing for coffee is in order, go out and get some exercise together. One of the things that many mothers and daughters struggle with is seeing each other more as equals as they get older. To improve your mother-daughter relationship, trying to find mutual interests, or things you can learn about together, can help put things on a more even footing. Spending time together also gives you and your mother time to learn more about who you are as people, outside of your parent-child relationship.

Say thank you to your mom

For most people, even if they had a hard childhood, there’s something they can thank their mother for. Send your mother a card, everyone loves getting a real letter in the mail as it’s such a novelty these days, and say thank you; for doing the best you could, for keeping me fed and sheltered, for teaching me how to be the woman I am today. Tell your mom that you love her for who she’s been to you, and that you want to improve your mother-daughter relationship. That you look forward to a new, more adult, relationship with your mom, and are excited about this new road that you can walk together as adult women.

Mother-daughter relationships are challenging, but our mothers shape us in so many ways, big and small. The more we can improve our mother-daughter relationships, the better our relationships will be with our own daughters.

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Valentine Belue

Update: 2024-08-26